Allison M.

A crossdresser's thoughts on life, fashion, fabulousness, and (oh yeah) dressing up

At the end of a long February…

Leave a comment

On a couple of occasions in this blog’s early years, I ended a long (for me) month by posting a soothing picture of a serene sunset somewhere on the internet, all for the sake of mental decompression.  I must do so again here, at the end of a long (for me) month by posting this picture of the Aurora Borealis found here.  (Yeah, it’s not technically a sunset, but still…)

I need this bit of serenity after what for me has been a long month (ironic since it’s only 28 days long) and especially this work week.  For the sake of anonymity and not boring you to death, I won’t get into too much detail, other than to say that a colleague and I have been put on a very big project.  One of our immediate supervisors has very big expectations of us on this project, so much so that she’s had three big meetings with my colleague and I this week alone.  Needless to say, if we get results, she will be pleased… and she’s a very hard person to please.

The reason for this project is that our organization is seeking some long sought revenue, some of which was missed because the predecessors in my assignment at work… well, let’s just say they were so busy with their assigned work, they forgot to do a few important things.  I wonder if I’ve inherited their mistakes.  What I mean by that is I’ve noticed I’ve been having to do the very same things and using the very same processes they had to do.  And as a result, it will, in one way or another, cause me to make the same mistakes they did.  And if those mistakes were to repeat themselves, our organization will be caught in a never-ending circle:  Do one thing, miss out on another, play catch-up, hope it gets results, repeat.  Yeah, being in that circle doesn’t benefit anyone.

So, yeah, I’m feeling two kinds of pressure, that which is coming from our organization’s leadership… and that which is coming from my own expectations.  Since coming into this assignment nearly 7 months ago, I’ve gone through a lot of sweat (figuratively) and tears (literally) in making a good impression on the people of this office.  And I know I’ve made more than a few mistakes and missed more than a few things that needed to be done.

But at least that my supervisor seems to be a bit understanding that I’m still trying to master everything, and they’re encouraging “process improvements” to help end that endless circle of missed work.  I know I’ve done a few improvements on my own, some more perfect than others.  And management has made their own improvement recommendations.  I just hope that whatever improvements we come up with, I will do them as best as I can and make that good impression… which may, hopefully, lead to a permanent role with this organization (see, I’m still in a long-term temp role).

So now you know why my mind is in need of venturing once again to that quiet spot in the middle of proverbial nowhere.  Work, and the demands of work, can put a strain on even the purest of souls.  And a natural light show on some lake should take my mind off of work, help soothe my mental burdens, help straighten out the cranial knots, and even… *yawn* allow me to get the sleep I need.  Not that I’ve been missing out on sleep, just that sleep does any mind good.

On the eve of March, here’s hoping that this project of mine goes well, and that when April comes around, my mind won’t be as stressed.  Here’s hoping your March goes well as well.  Good night.

Author: Allison M.

A part of the trans community ("cross-dresser" is the term that applies to me) who finds themselves much more expressive and somewhat more confident when presenting in a feminine persona. An admirer and supporter of those who are fashionable, fabulous, and friendly (LGBT or otherwise). Someone who tries to be witty and unique, but is not even remotely perverted or a pariah (I am a real human being, just like you). Using various writing styles on this blog to communicate thoughts and feelings concerning my life experiences, fashion sense, and the world at large (and maybe impressing my high school creative writing teacher who deservedly gave me middling grades).

Leave a good word or two :)

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s